February 14, 2009

My Very Perfect Day

I awake around 8:00. Not to an alarm. But to the smell of coffee brewing.
I stretch. I nudge Cocoa to get off my right ankle and I get out of bed.
Coach is quietly sleeping, I don't recall using my ear plugs at all last night.
I notice that NOT one bone or muscle hurts today. It is going to be a fine day.

I go to the restroom. I brush my pearly white perfectly straight teeth and I notice that I have not a crow foot or a puffy spot any where to be found on my face.
*thinks to self: that $3 face cream from target works wonders*
Wow, I may have to stop using it so much, because my neck and jaw are so tight and thin...I may soon resemble a
Super Model.
I also don't recall even getting up in the middle of the night to, that may be why I am so well rested.

I head to the kitchen barefoot, still wearing my sexy nightie and pour my just brewed coffee.
Just the right amount of splenda and the perfect amount of hazelnut creamer.
None of this has any calories.

As I am doing this, I hear the faint sound of giggling and something else...It is a hum of some sort.... I can't quite put my finger on this sound.....I head to the back of the house towards the playroom. What do my non-sleepy eyes see? Both my girls fully dressed and laughing. What are they laughing at?
They are laughing because they are so giddy to be up and vacuuming the playroom. I also see a dust rag and some cleaner for the counters....
They are going to surprise me with cleaning today! I leave quickly before they see me...I have a huge smile on my face.

(Yesterday they surprised me by cleaning the garage top to bottom.)

I head quietly back to my closet to get some exercise clothes on.

I grab the size 4 shorts from a few years ago and surprise! They are loose! I put on my running shoes and head to the treadmill.

I run for 15 miles. Imagine that, 15 miles in 15 minutes?!? I am just amazing. And my feet and legs don't hurt one bit.

I take my still hot coffee and let the dogs out to go potty. They both run the outer edge of the property to do their business. They don't want any one to accidentally step in it. They are so wonderful. They proceed to wipe their paws clean before coming back in the house.

I grab their bowls and go outside to scoop their food from the endlessly filled food tub. They don't drool one little bit on the floor either.

I grab the newspaper that is just steps from the front door. I bring it in and set it on the kitchen table for Coach.
I don't usualy read the paper, afraid of all the bad news myself.....
But I notice on the front page today as I lay it out, it says:

"Job market is wide open. Work, high pay and insurance for everyone"

"Housing market UP like never before, homes for everyone"

"Cancer Cured"

"Peace in the middle East"

"War Over, all Soldiers head home unharmed"

"Humans, Animals and Earth Coexist in Ecological Peace"

"Fountain of YOUTH found in BusyBeeSuz's back yard"

This all makes me so darn happy.
I decide right there to send a big check to all the charities that send me all those return address labels. (about 72 different charities) this is no problem because we have so much money in the bank, I should have been giving it away all this time.

While at my desk, I also open up our electric and bill and am a bit disappointed that after having all our solar panels in place, they are only paying me $750.00 this month.

Maybe next month it will be better.

After spending these few minutes at my desk, I realize that I am hungry.

I head to the kitchen and begin making a delicious breakfast for my family.

I make blueberry pancakes, cholesterol free omelet's, fresh cut fruit, fat free bacon.
Making breakfast today took all of 8 minutes. I am really quick.

I am craving fresh orange juice.
I send the dogs out to the grove out back and they come back in with 16 perfect oranges for me. I drop them into my orange juice squeezer and out comes the most delicious orange juice you could ever dream of.

Wait, what is this? I taste a hint of champagne in this OJ.

Oh goodness , the dogs brought me the Mimosa infused oranges. This will have to do today.

I send the dogs back out for some apples now from the orchard, the girls just LOVE apple Juice.

My family comes enters into the kitchen and they proceed to fawn all over me, saying how wonderful I perfect this breakfast is and they insist on cleaning it all up for me while I go get a 4 hour full body massage.

To be continued....


  1. What a perfect day! Can I share in your perfect day? Now you have me thinking about what my perfect day would look like...hmmm. Look forward to hearing about the rest of your very perfect day! Have a great weekend!

  2. that IS a perfect day!
    happy valentines day to you and your hubby <3

  3. I'm putting on MY size 4 running shorts and jogging right over to join you in YOUR dream world, darling. It sounds SO much more pleasant than reality. :-)

    Thanks for the smiles, sweetie. I LOVED this! :-)

  4. I hope you don't mind.... but I'm going to have to link over to this on my site... it's just TOO darn cute!

  5. is good!

  6. OMG, Suz!!! You've outdone yourself this time! I ADORE this post!! You are so damn funny, and such a very talented writer. Have you ever considered making this your career? (I'm serious, by the way! I'd buy your book in a heartbeat!)

  7. Don't wait too long to continue! I like living in your world!

  8. Is this one of your dreams? I don't think it will be difficult to analyze this one! Go for it! It's all good, and you deserve it. =)

  9. Suz- This is too good to be true : ). I want to get some of that wrinkle cream. I LOVE the news. That is the best. and last but not least; 15 miles in 15 minutes. Wow that is SO cool : ).
    I hope this happens for you tomorrow morning : ).

  10. Can I be in your dream day? It sounds fab.

  11. great fun. Later in the day you are meeting me at the mall for a few hours of girlie shopping, and I treat you to a new Coach purse

  12. Have you been peeking in my window? This is like EVERYday for me...especially the sexy nightie part.

  13. I think you are constipated.

  14. Oh my gosh, this is too funny! But what a perfect day

  15. Just when I thought you couldn't get any funnier! :) I can't wait to see how this perfect day ends!! :)

  16. LOL - Grandma J's comment had me laughing out loud!

  17. I popped over from Happy Wife Happy Life's blog. Your day sounds perfect!! Did you know that they now have Hazelnut sugar free creamer which is already sweetened with Splenda? Hazelnut is my fav too. Used to be Cinnamon Hazelnut until they discontinued it.

    Happy Valentine's Day!

    Much love from NJ,

  18. Maybe if I come down to your place, I might be able to fit into my size 34 waist blue jeans, as well as have blood pressure of 110/70.

  19. The mimosa infused oranges sound devine! I need to get some of those too. Maybe I'll just have Baby Rocket Dog run out and fetch me some! Yum. You do bring a smile to my face:<)

  20. hahahahaha very cute and funny! you must have gotten lucky last night to wake up in such a good mood.


  21. I am evious of your perfect day... I can't wait to hear how it continues. I'm thinking, shopping using a credit card with no limit..... just to name one thing :)

    Hope your Valentine's was a good one!

  22. Totally got sucked into this fantasy line, hook and sinker!

    More please...


    Your Harlequin Fan :-D

  23. Ha---how cute!!!! That is a perfect day for sure... Can't wait to hear the rest of this dream!!!!

    I was believing it 'til you got to newspaper part... Oh--how I wish!!!!!

    If your Size 4 shorts are loose--then my size 18 shorts are tight!!! And that is NO dream!!! ha


  24. That sounds exactly like the day I am having.... tomorrow!

  25. Your electric company paid you? Obviously it's not TVA! Oh, how I wish I had a perfect day like this. I can't wait for it to be continued.

  26. I'm coming over to your house...

  27. Hi Suz,
    It sounds like you woke up in Heaven! Love coffee fixed your way! Can't wait to hear 'the rest of the story'.

  28. What a wonderful dreamy day.

  29. Will you send me the number for your crack dealer. He's gooooood!


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